The battle of Ron and Don officially came to an ignominious end on Sunday afternoon, with the Florida governor abandoning his presidential bid and endorsing his onetime rival on the way out. Tail between his legs, Ron DeSantis acknowledged in his video message that though he’d had his “disagreements” with the former president, it was “clear” that Donald Trump was a “superior” option to President Joe Biden.
The concession was a far cry from the trash-talking DeSantis once indulged in behind the scenes at the height of his nascent campaign. But although the governor reportedly ranted privately about the “moron who has no business running for president,” he only rarely feinted at publicly attacking Trump, preferring to keep his swipes blunted and bloodless.
That didn’t stop Trump from unleashing broadside after broadside at what was once his biggest threat on the trail to the Republican nomination. The former president assailed DeSantis both in public and privately as “overrated, disloyal, and a know-nothing,” a friend told Vanity Fair last year. DeSantis met Trump’s various insults, jibes, and snark-laden nicknames with feeble comebacks, insisting as part of an ostensible high-road strategy that they were “juvenile,” “phony,” and actually helping boost his profile with voters somehow.
With Sunday’s endorsement, it would seem that all has been forgotten—or at least forgiven. Luckily for Meatball Ron, though, The Daily Beast remembers, and has put together a glossary for posterity. Below, some of the best of the worst Trump had to offer the man who was once seen as the heir apparent to the MAGA cause.
Ron DeSanctimonious
Trump’s preferred nickname for DeSantis. (In response, DeSantis once joked that he didn’t even know how to spell the vowel-heavy name, a sick burn that didn’t quite stick the landing.) Debuting it at a Pennsylvania rally in Nov. 2022, Trump “officially retired” the moniker before a jubilant crowd in New Hampshire on Sunday. See also: DeSaster—which trended in the wake of DeSantis’ bungled campaign launch—DeSanctus, DisHonest, DeEstablishment, and DeSoros.
Pudding Fingers
This one’s our doing.
Meatball Ron
Trump has never publicly called DeSantis “Meatball Ron,” a jab that The New York Times reported last year he was workshopping in casual conversation alongside “Shutdown Ron.” Trump refuted this on Truth Social a few days later, calling it “totally inappropriate.” He also derided the nickname as unworthy of his poetic talents, telling reporters the next month that referring to DeSantis as a meatball was “too crude.” But without it, we never would have gotten to hear Stephen Colbert croon—to the tune of ‘Uptown Girl’—“Meatball Ron / Marinara is his big turn on / Very scared of CRT / Loves to roll around in spaghetti / With extra cheese.”
Tiny D
On a flight aboard Trump Force One in March 2023, Trump reportedly mused to a reporter who’d asked about potential future nickname’s that “Tiny D’s good.” Rolling Stone later reported that Trump’s advisers were pushing for him to make this DeSantis’ primary mean nickname, with one referring to it as the “small-dick PsyOp.”
Rob
This succinct nickname grew out of a cheeky reference to a typo in a Daily Mail headline, if Trump’s team are to be believed. “ICYMI: Steve Bannon calls Rob DeSantis a ‘weasel’ and Mike Lindell brands him ‘disgusting’ for his response to Trump’s looming indictment…” a March press release blared. Trump later referred to Ron as Rob in multiple Truth Social statements.
Having a Personality Crisis
“The problem with Ron DeSanctimonious is that he needs a personality transplant, and those are not yet available,” Trump quipped in a May 2023 campaign ad, adding, “I would say that when it comes to lack of personality, Ron would be in a class with Asa Hutchinson, and that’s not good.” In yet another Truth Social post last May, Trump decreed that DeSantis was in desperate need of a personality transplant “and, to the best of my knowledge, they are not medically available yet.” Zing!
He’s Gay (and a Pedophile)
After DeSantis mentioned the Stormy Daniels affair at a press conference, Trump’s homophobic response was to challenge his sexuality—and insinuate that he might have preyed on some of his underage students. “Ron DeSanctimonious will probably find out about FALSE ACCUSATIONS & FAKE STORIES sometime in the future, as he gets older, wiser, and better known, when he’s unfairly and illegally attacked by a woman, even classmates that are ‘underage’ (or possibly a man!),” Trump fumed on Truth Social. “I’m sure he will want to fight these misfits just like I do!”
He Doesn’t Have Testicles
As DeSantis geared up last summer to attend a Nevada event known for serving lamb testicles, a Trump campaign spokesperson quipped to NBC News, “Not surprised Ron DeSantis is looking for a set of balls.”
A Mitt Romney Clone
At a speech in Davenport, Iowa last March, Trump mentioned offhandedly that DeSantis reminded him of another presidential loser. “I’m not a big fan of Mitt Romney, lost his election and to be honest with you, Ron reminds me a lot of Mitt Romney,” he said. Then, appearing to address DeSantis directly, he added, “So, I don’t think you’re going to be doing so well here. But we’re going to find out.” (Trump won the leadoff in Iowa earlier this month, with DeSantis finishing a distant second.)
A Deeply “Average” Politician…
Despite endorsing DeSantis for governor in 2018, Trump eventually flipped on his rival’s pandemic-era leadership, rambling on Truth Social in Nov. 2022 that he was “an average REPUBLICAN Governor with great Public Relations, who didn’t have to close up his state, but did, unlike other Republican Governors, whose overall numbers for a Republican, were just average—middle of the pack.”
… Who’s Ruined His Own State
In a full-court email press last April, the Trump team reminded his supporters that DeSantis had wrecked the Sunshine State. “The real DeSantis record is one of misery and despair,” spokesperson Steven Cheung said. “He has left a wake of destruction all across Florida and people are hurting because he has spent more time playing public relations games instead of actually doing the hard-work needed to improve the lives of the people he represents.” The email also designated Florida as “among the worst states” in which to live, work, and raise a family.
A “Politically Dead” Crybaby
In that same Truth Social screed, Trump claimed he’d singlehandedly propelled DeSantis to the governor’s office. “Ron came to me in desperate shape in 2017—he was politically dead, losing in a landslide…” Trump recalled. “Ron had low approval, bad polls, and no money, but he said that if I would Endorse him, he could win.” In an interview a few months later, he added that DeSantis had actively been crying during this overture. “He said, ‘If you endorse me, I’ll win,’ and there were tears coming down from his eyes,” Trump said.
Very Disloyal!
Again: Trump made DeSantis. As DeSantis prepared to announce his presidential run, Trump started bleating to anyone who would listen that he was being “very disloyal” by challenging him. “I do think it would be a great act of disloyalty because, you know, I got him in. He had no chance. His political life was over,” he told the Associated Press in Jan. 2023. Trump would never do such a thing, he told The Messenger. “I’m a loyal person,” he explained. “If that happened to me, I would never run against the guy that did that.”
He Hates Farmers (?)
“The farmers love Trump,” Trump proclaimed at a March 2023 rally. “They keep saying, ‘I think DeSantis can do OK with farmers. I don’t think so. Based on polls, he’s not doing OK with anything.” Last month, he added, “DeSanctus doesn’t even like farmers! He doesn’t like farmers. I said, that’s not good. He doesn’t want to get that word out. No, he doesn’t like farmers. He fought the farm bills, he fought everything.” It remains unclear whether, in fact, DeSantis actually hates farmers.
